tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61870384278553365702024-02-19T08:36:20.080-08:00Blueberries and BootsLeah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-30437818307764148042013-07-08T10:44:00.001-07:002013-07-08T10:44:44.790-07:00Casting My Cares on Him"I will cast my cares on You the Almighty,<br />
I will cast my cares on You cause You're Good,<br />
I will cast my cares on You cause You love me, You love me.<br />
All, All, All, because You love me."<br />
_ "Cast My Cares" by Tim Timmons_<br />
<br />
Today, I am definitely feeling confident in who God is and where He is leading me. Although I am a pastor's wife, that doesn't mean I am always sure of God's plans for my life. I have days where I think, "God this is not a good plan... what are You thinking?!" It's funny to look back on those times and think that God was probably kind of of laughing at me saying, "Really Leah? You're going to ask ME if this is a good idea?! My child, if only you could see the bigger picture." I love when He gives me glimpses of His bigger plan. <br />
<br />
My husband, Jared, described it perfectly to someone the other day. He told a couple at our church that we're going through a season where God reveals something that we want to to jump on right away, but God says "Wait, there's more."<br />
<br />
How about that? "Wait, there's more."<br />
<br />
God's like the ultimate game show host who always has more for you. Even in the darkest hours, He has good things for you. All He asks is for you to "cast your cares on Him". That's all. I wish the simplicity of that request would slap me on the forehead like those V8 commercials when I feel like I have no clue what to do. <br />
<br />
Today, I feel at peace. Sure, it probably has something to do with the new job I'm starting on the 22nd. But I also think it has something to do with the battle we are fighting to win Elkhart for Christ. "My God is so big and so strong and so mighty, there's nothing my God cannot do." That's a verse from a song we learned at Sports Camp and it's stuck with me. The truth in it is so powerful. I love singing and dancing to it. Just like a child.<br />
<br />
So let me ask you this, what words are sticking with you?<br />
<br />
Are they truths of goodness, or lies of despair? <br />
<br />
Which one are you going to let linger? I would challenge you to grab old of His truth and don't let go. Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-12152415084967654772013-06-12T10:03:00.002-07:002013-06-12T10:03:32.902-07:00Finding the Balance<div style="text-align: center;">
After much urging by my husband... here I am again. About to divulge my heart and feelings for a page on the internet that I don't even know who reads. But it's a good feeling to know someone is reading this and can get a glimpse of how reality hits and we have to grab onto God's hope and keep pushing onward. As I've been contemplating the point of my blog, I've seen that it's morphed into a platform for me to get rid of the taboo of not discussing miscarriages and a way for me to reach women who may not know how to talk about it. I'm a communicator so it has to come out in words some how... why not a blog? </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
So the other day I went to the library and looked up books on miscarriages and was surprised at how few there are. Maybe 10 in all the libraries in the Mishawaka/South Bend area. I ended up bringing two home. One was a lot of stats on them and how a childless father researched it for himself after his wife was unable to carry multiple children to full term.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
But it was the second book that grabbed my attention.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
It was about a woman who has one daughter, lost 3 children, then how she did all that she could to carry her 5th child (a boy) to full term. I found it hard to read at times because it wasn't just a story - it was reality. She was honest about her fears and shared alot of the information she found in studies on miscarriages. But she also had no joy in her last pregnancy. It was a very sad, depressing story about how she took all this burden on herself. She all but stated that if she miscarried again it would be her fault for not doing all she could prevent it.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
When I first started reading it, I began thinking this way. I needed to know why I miscarried and how to prevent it from happening again. I didn't want to take chances.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
But then where did my Faith in God fit in to all that?</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I met with a very wise woman and was sharing with her all of this when she stopped me mid sentence and said "Leah, I'm hearing a lot of "I have to". You're taking on a lot of responsibility for things that are beyond your control. That's not healthy."</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
It was the slap upside the head that I needed to pull myself out of this muck I was letting myself sit in. Looking back, I'm glad I read that book so I know what a pregnancy can look like when you do it in your own power, never letting God carry your burden and carry you through. It's amazing to me how stressed this woman let herself become because she was on her own. Always pushing doctors to do more, and fighting to not connect with the child inside for fear of losing him, all while trying to deal with the trauma of her past pregnancies. She was so alone. </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I don't want that to be my story. That thought urges me to write. To talk about Elisha. To share the joy along with the pain.To connect with Jared even if it's a hard conversation. To do the best with what I know at this point to help prepare my body for another baby when we 're ready. The rest is in God's hands. Some days that's easier to let go of, where others I wish I had a list I could check off and at the end say "Okay, I'm ready!" and know without the shadow of a doubt that there will be a healthy baby at the end of the journey. </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br />Then there's reality. Sitting there. Unrelenting. And I know this is the way it has to be. I can wish for that magical list all I want, but it will never happen. So instead, I am asking God what He wants me to do with this part of me. How Jared and I can reach others that have gone through the same heartache. I'm contemplating writing a book. Goodness knows my blogs are long enough! Please leave comments if you've read this. It encourages me and lets me know I'm reaching someone. Sometimes I feel like I'm babbling so an encouraging word would go a long way... </div>
Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-35932454933087883032013-05-29T08:14:00.000-07:002013-05-29T08:14:57.340-07:00Emotional Ups and Downs<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0in;
mso-para-margin-right:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0in;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“Don’t let your
emotions control you.”</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Boy, is that easier
said than done! I feel like that’s been my battle these past 6 months. God has
a funny timing with things. Let me explain. On June 1<sup>st</sup>, it will
have been six months since our little Elisha Gregory went to Heaven. Then on
June 2<sup>nd</sup>, Jared and I will be celebrating our One Year Anniversary!
A little bittersweet, but I’m looking forward to both milestones. It means
we’re moving forward and embracing what gifts, trials, and blessings the Lord
has seen fit to give us.</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
As these dates fast
approach, I am finding myself juggling lots of emotions. Today I got a call
from my OBGYN informing me that I need to be on Progesterone permanently. I
feel naïve for having thought that I just needed to take it for a few months so
my body would get a kick-start on producing the hormone like normal. The call
was like a sucker-punch to the abdomen. I was surprised at how emotional I got
over this bit of news.</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Thankfully, my
husband is phenomenal at coaxing my thoughts out of me. You see, to me this
phone call was like a confirmation of why we lost Elisha. I’m sure you’re
sitting there thinking, “that’s not true!” I know it may not be, but that
thought still lingers – good or bad. It’s also just frustrating that this
wasn’t taken care of before. I could blame people or myself, but that would get
us no where. And even still, I find moments where I’m content to be where I am
in life on the family status. Not pregnant. You may think this sounds awful,
but there are some perks to not being 7 months along. Don’t get me wrong, I
would be swollen and proud of it if Elisha was still in my womb, but I’m
learning to be content.</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
No more “ should be”.
Instead I am embracing the “I’m not. It hurts sometimes, but I’m ok” mentality.
Along with that, I’ve decided it’s best for me to leave Facebook for a season.
With so many friends having babies and swollen bellies, it just sends me on an
emotional roller coaster later in the day after I get on. I’m happy for them, I
just need a little more space from it all. So I decided to stop inundating
myself with baby news via Facebook where it’s ALL OVER my news feed.</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I know it won’t be
like this forever. For this season, I am choosing to be more wise with what I
let myself dwell on and how much I see of certain things that are triggers for
me. I am learning that my heart is still fragile, but God is good and I am to
be a wise steward of protecting it. For those friends of mine that are
pregnant, I’m not cutting off all connection, just on Facebook.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want to hear how you are doing and am
praying daily for health over you and the baby! I look forward to seeing and
holding your baby someday… especially my sister’s. Callie May is due two weeks
after our Elisha would have been. I know I will cry, but they will be tears of
healing and happiness and gratitude for the life we had and for the life, that
remains.</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
He is a good God,
Always. And with that I can say, it is well with my soul.</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-57938113077997709502013-03-29T13:47:00.002-07:002013-03-29T13:52:38.230-07:00What Does Normal Look Like?As Jared and I have gone through some of the most trying times of our lives since we've been married (moving, changing jobs, church planting,etc) nothing could have prepared us for the loss of our child. It has now been almost 3 months since our precious little one went to be with the Father. At the start of the grieving process, I contemplated quitting my job and was glad when I finished my 2 weeks notice. I prayed for a low stress job and ended up landing a delivery gig for a local florist. I am currently only allowed to do arrangements for the owners of deceased pets (it's okay to laugh)- among other things, but I will be moving up as my skill level increases! I am so thankful for this job, but in it I have begun to wrestle with delivering flowers to funeral homes. At first, it didn't bother me. But with Easter coming up, I am reminded that God knows our pain of losing our only child, I have been thinking about how our own child may never be remembered the way others who lived long lives do.<br />
<br />
Now, I don't want you to think I am writing this to get sympathy or flowers or what have you. No, I am writing this because of how culture tends to see miscarriages. There is usually a condolence given and then nothing more. I'm not sure if it's because no one knows how to handle the loss of a person that was never "born" or if women are holding themselves responsible and thus grieve behind closed doors - ashamed to tell others that they couldn't bring forth life. It's a hard one to sort out. And each woman has her own way of grieving, just as each person has their own way of showing sympathy.<br />
<br />
But I urge you. Don't forget them! The mother and the father are still trying to find what that normal in their lives should look like. This precious gift that was given to them and taken too soon was loved just as much as any other child they may have. So think on those who have had a miscarriage. Whether it was recently or years ago. Write them a note. Send them a letter. <b>DO SOMETHING </b>to let them know you recognize their child. Last night, I came home to find a gift on my back door step. Inside was a beautiful blanket and 3 cards. 3 couples wanted to remind us that they were praying for us and show us they cared, knowing that we were still trying to grasp this new reality without our baby. Today as I sat wrapped in that blanket, I prayed for these couples that God would bless them more than they had Jared and me. <br />
<br />
My own mother had 4 miscarriages. 3 were fairly close together and a friend wrote a beautiful poem/letter to my mother as if it were written by her children. This was framed and hung in the hallway for all to see. I remember reading it many times as I grew up. Mary, Joseph, Faith, and Isaiah were all remembered in our house. <br />
<br />
What I am asking of you is please not to forget those children lost to a miscarriage. Reach out to the moms and dads. <br />
<br />
p.s. Celebrating the life that was is helpful too. See where the mother is at, and let them dwell on how big their child would be now. Give them a place to share their joy along with their pain. <br />
<br />Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-46620213631463361732013-03-04T17:16:00.001-08:002013-03-04T17:16:37.407-08:00Shattered Dream, Broken Hearts<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0in;
mso-para-margin-right:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0in;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
A lot has happened in my life since I last blogged on here. I’ve
learned and grown a lot over these past 9 months of marriage. Not just about
myself, but about how my husband and I work together through everything we
promised we would in our vows. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Life is crazy and messy and sometimes it hurts more than we
think we can handle, but the truth is… God is good through it all. Now, there
was a time when I would have scoffed at that statement and said, “Yeah right.
How good is a God that allowed me to miscarry our first child?” Truth is, that
was a dark time for Jared and me. Well, there are days it still is. It’s only
been 2 months, but the hurt is still there and very near. I’m getting ahead of
myself, let me back up a bit.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It’s mid December and I just started working at Bashor
Children’s Home in Goshen. This was my first real job since college and I was
about to learn how intense it could be – working with mal-adapted children that
have been abused, abused others, or used drugs definitely has its stressers!
Earlier that week, I’d been feeling funny. My stomach had weird twinges and I
was more hungry than normal. Thanks to my handy dandy charting for Family
Planning, I was able to realize sooner than most that it was time to take a
pregnancy test. We had some on hand from bridal gag gifts so I got up on a
Saturday morning and went straight to take a test – Jared had no idea, he was
playing a video game or something. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When that second pink line started to show up, I yelled
“Jared! Come Here!” He came thinking he needed to kill a bug for me, but it
didn’t take long for him to put 2 and 2 together with the pregnancy test on the
counter and my shocked expression. The conversation went like this…</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Are we pregnant?!”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“umm… yes?”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Seriously?!”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“This is crazy.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Holy cow we’re pregnant!”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“We are having a baby!”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I KNOW!”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
A few days later, we went and saw our family practitioner
who suggested we see a Dr. who could help determine whether my hormone levels
were high enough, but other than that we were good to go. We announced to my
in-laws at our Christmas gathering with a black onesie that said “Baby Gregory
August 2013” Less than a week later, Jared had chest pains and fainted, so we
went to the ER. He was released soon after – it wasn’t heart issues, PTL! – but
then I was checked in. I had been bleeding and wanted to make sure the baby was
ok. We had a VERY early ultra sound and 3-D ultra sound. Little did we know
these would be the only images we’d have of our baby. We were about 6 ½ weeks
along. Everything checked out ok and I was released with an understanding to
keep an eye on the spotting and take pre-natal vitamins. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The next day we told my family and 2 days later, we realized
that all 4 of us older siblings were expecting in 2013. My older sister,
Lindsay, and I were only a week apart. We’ve always been close so this was an
extra fun surprise for us! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Now it’s New Year’s Day and I was working at Bashor again… I
had just eaten dinner and then it happened. There is nothing more inhumane to
me than having to flush your unborn child down a toilet as you sit there
helplessly knowing there’s nothing you can do for something so small that you
love so much. Words can’t describe the helplessness, disappointment, loss,
pain, and guilt. It’s hard to not wonder what went wrong. “Why did my body
reject such a precious gift?” There could be a million answers to that
question, but I chose to not blame myself and I’m not going to hate my body for
it. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
3 days later, my best friend got married and I was able to
stand beside her as her matron of honor. In the middle of the reception, my
oldest sister gave birth to my 3<sup>rd</sup> niece(on the Smith side), Emily
Mavis. I am very grateful that the LORD gave Jared and I the grace and strength
to see her 2 hours old. It was hard at first, but I’ll never forget how it
helped my hurting heart just a little bit to hold that tiny bundle. I know it
meant a lot to my sister and brother-in-law as well.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s hard not to cry
as I type this. It helps to go over the details… re-live the good things.
Healing is a process and Jared and I are learning how to go through it one day
at a time. Let me leave you some ways you can help us heal…</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>PLEASE! Do acknowledge that Jared and I are
parents. We may not have living children, but we do have a child… birth
certificate or not. </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Please do NOT tell us anything you wouldn’t tell
parents that lost their 4yr old. To quote Doctor Seuss, “a person’s a person,
no matter how small” </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Also, please refrain from saying things like “you
can try again” or “the next egg will stick” or “you’ll have kids and they’ll be
such a blessing”. I know all these things. When these things are said, I honestly
want to hit someone. So this leads to my next helping point…</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Sometimes saying nothing means more than
speaking when you’re not sure what to say. </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">5.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Acknowledging in some way that we’ve lost a
child is more meaningful than anything. </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">6.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Please refrain from telling your whole story if
you have gone through the same thing. I know you understand my situation, but my hurt
is different. Please do not compare. Simply saying, “I have miscarried as well,
and know it’s a hard healing process” is really all I need. If I invite you to share your story... feel free!</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For now, we are finding our “new normal”. I hate it, but am
learning to go through it anyway and some days I think about our child more
than others. Sometimes I have to refrain myself from turning green when I see
pregnant women. Just depends on how I’m doing that day. But I am healing…. One
day at a time, one hug at a time, one tear at a time. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-86873659984455814222012-08-22T14:20:00.003-07:002012-08-22T14:20:29.137-07:00"The Nook"The Ladies Of The Lord (or L.O.L. as we affectionately call it) at my church are doing a book study on <i>Good to Great in God's Eyes</i> by Chip Ingram. I'm not sure I even heard of this man before reading his book, but he's so wise and insightful. It's hard not to pick up the book and devour every ounce of wisdom he offers in it. The book is about 10 things great Christians do in their lives that help them achieve greatness and righteousness in God's eyes. The title pretty much speaks for itself, but the 10 things in this book are invaluable things that are so logical, yet so full of wisdom when you put think on them and then put them into action.<br />
<br />
Each chapter has a theme like "Pursue Great People" or "Think Great Thoughts"<i>.</i> What struck me is that even though I'm on chapter four, these themes meld together as you start applying them to your daily life. The chapter, <i>"</i>Read Great Books"<i> </i>went right along with the last chapter I read "Dream Great Dreams". God doesn't just give us desires and dreams to say "Well, you screwed that one up so better luck with the next dream!" He wants us to cultivate these dreams and seek them in His power and might. Not our own. That's one of the key parts of having a dream. Knowing it's in His hands. I'm getting a little carried away... <br />
<br />
Back to my point... These two chapters went together because I just started reading <i>Onward</i> by Howard Schultz, the chairman, president, and ceo of Starbucks. (Fun fact: they don't use upper case letters to distinguish the higher ups from the other employees within their company). At the end of "Dream Great Dreams" I was challenged to write down my own dreams. One I dreamed up not too long ago came to mind and clicks completely with <i>Onward</i>. I have this idea of a coffee house. Now it's not an ordinary one, but a place of solitude, peace, and serenity. A place to order a latte then curl up with a good book, write that letter you've always wanted to, or just sit still and be.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUfhPUfENd4YDy9UNunFmqbX8KIhhcxPrMNru1UXV2j6qxF0EW92gZvKOjkDymEeXi7TQkWuBubftGjmkEGWvOZzToZ9ngrldMTXUH1E7Ptxw0a3dqRQb85kQDd5UJJOYUw3HTEtf93HU/s1600/coffee.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUfhPUfENd4YDy9UNunFmqbX8KIhhcxPrMNru1UXV2j6qxF0EW92gZvKOjkDymEeXi7TQkWuBubftGjmkEGWvOZzToZ9ngrldMTXUH1E7Ptxw0a3dqRQb85kQDd5UJJOYUw3HTEtf93HU/s320/coffee.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
This place would be called "The Nook". There would be no electronics allowed in the doors - except cellphones on vibrate. I want an environment that allows total freedom from the things of the world. A place for people to escape the chaotic schedule of daily life and to slip into a place all their own. I wouldn't sell anything besides a few books, coffee, tea, and some snacks. Just a simple place for a simple purpose. That is my dream. It sounds somewhat impossible to have such a place of tranquility in today's society, but I believe it can be done. This is my dream.<br />
<br />
What's yours? What are you desiring and have a passion for? Are you taking steps towards it? What's holding you back? Often times it's ourselves. Take a step in faith. You never know what you'll find along the way. Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-41924146208276003892012-08-13T08:25:00.000-07:002012-08-13T08:25:22.465-07:00Of Mice and Little LadiesThis all started about a month ago when I was vacuuming the house. I decided to move the couch from the "L" - shaped wall so I could vacuum behind it. That's when I got my first clue.... dog food scattered all over. Probably a good 30 pieces or so. Well, knowing it was the first time that spot had been vacuumed in goodness knows how long - remember, my husband was a bachelor for 3 years with a dog - I picked up the pieces and thought Gunnar's food had been spilled over there.<br />
<br />
Fast forward a week or two, I notice a piece of dog food on the basement stairs. I thought it was funny since Gunnar usually goes up and down the stairs with me, but not while he's eating. Oh well. Once again, I figured Gunnar had maybe kicked it (20 ft) away from his bowl and under the basement door. <br />
<br />
Now, we're up to Saturday night. I'm getting annoyed with the light above my head having one working bulb instead of 3 so I decide to change that. As I'm pushing the couch out of the "L", I notice another 10 pieces of dog food. So I pause... and tell Jared, "I think we have a mouse". At this time my poor husband is working on his sermon and has no idea what I'm talking about, so he somewhat annoyed says, "..um ok". Me, "I really think it's a mouse. How else would Gunnar's food get on the OTHER side of the wall when that's not possible and we know he's too big to get under the couch." And once again, Jared - trying to be patient with me - looks at me and says "I don't know Leah." The things I put my husband through. well, I decided if he was too busy I'd gather evidence. I compared the "couch" dog food with fresh ones and noticed the "couch" ones were nibbled down. Not to mention the droppings around them, Gunnar's massive size keeping him from getting under the couch, and the "L" shaped wall blocking any food from "jumping" out of Gunnar's bowl. I had my answer.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6DQFxJwJaEURVxPsCPoDIVa3wlUx5isQv-g6BY0Kjse186ChEifMJAO2_Sk_9L_-CstdGe1V64dBp4YTsP-Q2NGLm9N6xr-tslwVDpz2Mzx0iEMgQWs6MF9hX2_2zeFoKy9USSOyb6N0/s1600/mouse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6DQFxJwJaEURVxPsCPoDIVa3wlUx5isQv-g6BY0Kjse186ChEifMJAO2_Sk_9L_-CstdGe1V64dBp4YTsP-Q2NGLm9N6xr-tslwVDpz2Mzx0iEMgQWs6MF9hX2_2zeFoKy9USSOyb6N0/s1600/mouse.jpg" /></a></div>
After picking up THOSE pieces, Jared was done and we discussed the issue. Even got to show off my detective skills! So the next morning, I was curious. Sure enough, another 5 pieces were under the couch. We have a visitor. Maybe even more than one. It's obviously not the mouse that drowned in our water pump 2 months ago. Maybe a close relative. All I know is, this isn't my first rodeo (my roommates from the Row house in college can attest to that) and we are getting mouse traps.Once again, country life is always keeping me on my toes! Not to mention the broken down tractor in our front lawn, and half uprooted tree trunk. Ha ha ha All I'm missing is my cowgirl boots! I am officially a country girl - and loving every minute of it.<br />
<br />
Also, I wanted to wrap this blog up with a Happy Birthday to my baby sister Londyn Grace Whitney Smith!!<br />
She's a whopping 5 years old today! I miss that girl. My little diva/drama queen sister.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgahkRJAnodKOhKcNPql3c9RjWilIVkk5q6KVb9fV0G8jXRRe9LO9Q0efZsUa48xp2Kh186FqN8H_aNAPTzigac-gcJoBls6__sDGKugPb3-jC-Aw-uucTPrt2rhtNegyUqOGhYZbQAUoQ/s1600/100_4951.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgahkRJAnodKOhKcNPql3c9RjWilIVkk5q6KVb9fV0G8jXRRe9LO9Q0efZsUa48xp2Kh186FqN8H_aNAPTzigac-gcJoBls6__sDGKugPb3-jC-Aw-uucTPrt2rhtNegyUqOGhYZbQAUoQ/s320/100_4951.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWGbKxt_VgPRIlv7I53doJM6Df9ZlV7JdzwX4CH9VMvo9sUZyGAPBrO9Ga09WgAd4veWn1inquFc_B3nv5D0BLUzPPokEVive4ZJ5V46zwXBeKX2xSMiH4sgJROMlNKJQ_6hA-iHMsXh8/s1600/100_4942.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWGbKxt_VgPRIlv7I53doJM6Df9ZlV7JdzwX4CH9VMvo9sUZyGAPBrO9Ga09WgAd4veWn1inquFc_B3nv5D0BLUzPPokEVive4ZJ5V46zwXBeKX2xSMiH4sgJROMlNKJQ_6hA-iHMsXh8/s320/100_4942.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
I always wanted a little sister. Took me until I was 18 to get one, but I love her very much and am so glad God blessed our family by adding her to the bunch. What a sweetie pie!Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-20766277090937514132012-08-11T09:51:00.000-07:002012-08-11T09:52:23.281-07:00Yada This, Yada ThatGod has really been working on my heart in my prayer life since I've started reading the "Yada Yada Prayer Group" book series. I know it seems silly that a Christian Novel would be something God would speak through, but truely these books have inspired me to go beyond my normal comfort zone when it comes to prayer.<br />
<br />
I remember back in May going to a women's breakfast at my old church and a friend of mine said she was starting a book study on "The Yada Yada Prayer Group" and it didn't stop there. She also addressed the importance of prayer and how the Lord had been working on her heart about that. I didn't understand the connection.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<img alt="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51gVC69HktL._AA300_.jpg" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51gVC69HktL._AA300_.jpg" /></div>
<br />
How can a novel really challenge your prayer life to become more intimate? Turns out, the small library in my po-dunk town has ALL of the "Yada Yada" books, so - out of curiosity - I borrowed the first one. I admit, I wasn't too interested at first, but the faith these women show in their prayer lives and the way they pray makes you hunger for it in your own life. Yes, they're fictional characters, but the things they pray about are things that others around me or even I myself have experienced. It's an encouragement to read about a main character who struggles with her prayer life and learns to step out of her comfort zone to experience grace, freedom, joy, peace, mercy, and every gift the Father can give while maturing spiritually.<br />
<br />
The issues raised are so real and genuine that I can't help but think of certain people in my life as I read these books. Don't get me wrong, I'm no expert at praying in the Psalms, having a "quiet time" every day, or praising the Lord the way these ladies do (which is with child-like abandon!)... but I want to try. And you know what? I think that's exactly what the Lord wants us to do...<br />
<br />
"O taste and see<br />
That the Lord is good<br />
O taste and see<br />
That the Lord is good to me<br />
<span class="b-lyrics-from-signature"></span><br />
You've turned my mourning <br />
Into dancing<br />
Put off my rags and clothed me with gladness<br />
And I will arise and I will praise you<br />
I'll sing and not be silent<br />
<br />
O Lord, My God<br />
I will give thanks to you forever<br />
O Lord, My God<br />
I will give thanks to you <br />
<br />
And I'll live only for you<br />
And I'll lift these hands up to you<br />
And I'll dance before you<br />
I will shout it, I will shout it to you"Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-68892621479971129682012-08-02T14:00:00.000-07:002012-08-02T14:00:05.271-07:00Open and HonestAlright... it's time to pour my heart out... not completely open, but as much as I can.<br />
<br />
I'm tired... I'm drained... some mornings, I just want to stay in bed. I even find myself on the verge of tears when I let myself process what has been going on in the past 2 weeks.We just announced to the church last Sunday, that my husband (the senior and only pastor) has gone from full time to part time which also includes a pay reduction. It not only grieves me what Jared and I are going through, but what this means for the church as well. My heart aches for Sand Ridge and the congregation there. I love them all to pieces! I've been all over with my emotions. Sad, angry, hurt, joyful, upset, frustrated, worried, concerned, thankful, etc. Really, any emotion you can name, I've been there!<br />
<br />
That first Sunday the decision was made, Jared and I were somewhat in shock. Then as we processed God opened our eyes to what the possibilities could be for him, me, and above all, the church! This could be a great opportunity for SRCC to get back on their feet. We've had a lot happen, but one thing this church knows how to do right is Celebrate! I am determined to celebrate every thing I can in this time. Even in the pain, God is good. All the time.<br />
<br />
It doesn't mean I won't have emotions to deal with or even struggle with the reality of where Jared and I are right now, but God is faithful and He is proving that to us as we keep our eyes open to it every day. We are conquerors in Christ Jesus. I bare this burden with great joy, just as Paul did. There is no despair in Him. Only hope. Hope for a better future - for Jared, for me, and for Sand Ridge.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSIyGkduZvojycQsxpwAahwdqVtZZ40D9at_WB9WpXqxzlvsSLjiOohy9sAck2B10533onoBqtFIf_PtOPEPFf_xyPyAD7N0K_IpRrurkBzFU8AxppmcoECk4s3ilAy86A6Ix_vBjps1Q/s1600/hope-in-focus.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="232" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSIyGkduZvojycQsxpwAahwdqVtZZ40D9at_WB9WpXqxzlvsSLjiOohy9sAck2B10533onoBqtFIf_PtOPEPFf_xyPyAD7N0K_IpRrurkBzFU8AxppmcoECk4s3ilAy86A6Ix_vBjps1Q/s320/hope-in-focus.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
p.s. I have an interview for part time work and will be applying for a full time position at another place soon. God really is opening doors so please join me in praying that I will follow His lead and that Jared will as well.Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-55276745872168424592012-07-27T07:34:00.000-07:002012-07-27T07:34:55.858-07:00Lifes Uncertainties<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nothing in this life is certain… boy is that the truth!
Thankfully I can hold on to the hope that God is my provider and knows my needs
even before I ask. Figuring out this new phase of my life has been fun,
challenging, hard, and – at times – sad. It’s not easy coming from a family of
9 to a house in the woods with a man and a dog. Granted this isn’t just any man
or dog I’m talking about, but no matter what, change is always difficult. It
has its enjoyable moments as well, don’t get me wrong. I have learned to enjoy
a nice peaceful home and find joy in “setting up house”. The other day, I was
feeling down; like I wasn’t really providing much for the family and Jared told
me that I keep the house in much better shape than he has or ever will be able
to and that I’m great at what I do. Sounds silly, but it really helped boost my
self-esteem and I don’t doubt that what I do is important even if it seems as
simple as washing the dishes or scrubbing the toilet. It’s my part to give at
this point so I’m going to do it to the best of my ability. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Granted there are days where I just don’t want to do
anything. It’s hard to fight laziness when your husband is off at work.
Thankfully, mine gets to work from home every so often and it helps keep me
motivated knowing he’s in the other room working too. As for when he isn’t
home, I want to have something to show for what I did with my day. Sometimes
it’s not “seeable” but I can tell him and take pride in that I am doing
something with my life rather than moping and waiting for life to “happen to
me”. Marriage doesn’t allow for pity parties. Sure, you can squeeze one in, but
that usually means it’s squeezing your spouse out. The last thing I want to do
is push Jared away. I need him to encourage me as I apply for jobs, stand
beside me, love me, and (especially) to remind me of God’s promises. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We have been around each other a lot lately, but it’s been
good. I saw him in the Word the other day and made sure to make some time for
that myself. Last week I started working out (finally stopped just complaining
about marital weight gain and did something about it) and Jared decided he was
going to start getting back into shape with me. I love the challenges we
silently throw at one another. They’re not intended, so don’t think I’m saying
“your husband isn’t reading the Bible?! Well take yours out and he’ll magically
start to read too!” Your heart and mind have to be in the right place. But
these “silent challenges” have been good and are making us better people and a
stronger couple. I hope this post isn’t too all over the place… just felt like
sharing what’s been on my heart lately. </div>Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-67937169670836510992012-07-17T14:30:00.000-07:002012-07-17T14:30:16.880-07:00Feels Like HomeI have now been married a little over 6 weeks and my back two rooms are still full of stuff. I don't say this to blame my husband or myself... it's just how things are right now. I'm sure we can all identify with one room or another that has held "stuff". Well, being a newlywed wife and being on the hunt for jobs, I also tend to the house and try my best to get those rooms to be what they should be - a guest bedroom and an office. Last night, my husband wrote his own "Honey-Do" List and got it all done - while he felt sick! If that doesn't show me how much he loves me, I don't know what else would.<br />
<br />
While I'm so delighted he did that for me, I sadly realized the ball is back in my court. Now it's my things that are occupying the space. Funny how that works huh? Even with the size of our Double-wide, there still isn't adequate storage space; like bookshelves. Those would be wonderful! Jared and I are both avid readers and have talked about getting a Kindle for his Pastoral Care books (since he has a million of them). As for me, I like the old school feel of a book in my hands. I'd rather look at paper than a computer screen... kinda funny since I have a blog and not a journal huh? Anyway... back to the point.<br />
<br />
Once Jared moved "his things" out of the room, I could see mine more clearly. Thing is, I didn't want to see mine. I wanted mine to be taken care of too! I guess I thought Jared would magically take care of that too. Ha! Fat chance. He worked hard to move those things around and find places for them. My turn! Thankfully, I was able to become a little more creative and found a place for some of it in my kitchen<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkLq7GgoIavbDI4lX2YiArR-P1zJu5IY2FG7Ali2dXkz-HZvQcrCg8e64wimdqsz_ZxREtJXU36QBq6lSkCdfdvntyG9AP_IDUcYqpT4mHvy4zL2wq7hK7HEO5OwVLQd0HV5tllrEGmwc/s1600/100_5347.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkLq7GgoIavbDI4lX2YiArR-P1zJu5IY2FG7Ali2dXkz-HZvQcrCg8e64wimdqsz_ZxREtJXU36QBq6lSkCdfdvntyG9AP_IDUcYqpT4mHvy4zL2wq7hK7HEO5OwVLQd0HV5tllrEGmwc/s320/100_5347.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
Such a small feat, but hey I got rid of a box and a bag so baby steps are working!(I also did get some other things placed) And I'm realizing the more I get things "in place" the more I do feel at home. I've been calling this house my home, but to really "feel at home" requires your own style added to the mix. I'm hoping our home will be ready for guests by August and maybe even do an "open house" for our church and friends :) <br /><br />Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6187038427855336570.post-65442696224308693522012-07-11T13:14:00.000-07:002012-07-11T13:21:20.407-07:00Crash CourseThis being my first blog, please bear with me as I learn to be more eloquent with my postings of which I'm sure this one will probably be lacking. Actually, if anything, this post is all about "crash courses" and "new beginnings". I am a newlywed. Happily married to my best friend Jared after 3 1/2 years of dating. In June, I happily moved out to Central Illinois to help my husband at the church he pastor's and jump into a new way of life with him and our Golden Retriever, Gunnar. <br />
<br />
I am not sure entirely what these blogs will be about, but that's the freedom in writing one isn't it? The freedom of expression. I do have desires for this blog. I desire that it will encourage and uplift. That it will be full of trials and triumphs. That it will be a place for me to share what God is doing in my life. And that at times, it will be challenging to not only type, but for you to read (and hopefully apply) as well. <br />
<br />
Being married for 1 1/2 months in no way makes me an expert, but in one way I am getting a deeper understanding of what it is to love someone and to choose to love them everyday. The daily routine of life becomes one that can dull the marriage or it can be used to sharpen it. Jared and I have been reading devotions from " Devotions for a Sacred Marriage" by Gary Thomas. This particular version is a weekly one, but we try to read it daily. I would recommend this book to <i>any</i> married couple. It is full of challenges to see beyond your spouse's sins or shortcomings and to see them, cherish them, love them as God does. Having been married for a short time, I am not excluded from these things. I have already apologized to Jared numerous times for snapping at him, speaking unlovingly, sounding disrespectful, and even for actions I failed to do. These things happen, but I keep reminding myself that just because it happens, doesn't make it okay. I need to keep going back and asking forgiveness, just like I do with God when I sin against Him. I make it right again. I wish I could say I always get it right, but then that would make me like Jesus - perfect - which is definitely not true (or scriptural). <br />
<br />
My challenge to you would be... how am I loving my spouse? Do I admit when I do something disrespectful/unloving or do I let it slide by unless my husband/wife brings it up?<br />
<br />
I can guarantee, the sooner you start taking note of your shortcomings and acknowledge them to your spouse, they will notice and (in time) show their appreciation for it. Leah Gregoryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12865758410337780410noreply@blogger.com0